I'm Sorry is Not A Complete Apology

A sincere apology can contribute to the healing of a ruptured relationship. However, "I'M SORRY" alone won't have the healing power that an apology that shows care and respect would.

If you regret something you did, and we all do things that we later regret and wish we could adequately apologize, take the time to do it right.

 

Step 1: REFLECT ON YOUR ACTIONS

Ask yourself how your actions contributed to an injury or problem. Try to objectively view the role you played even if you were not the sole cause of the hurt or damage.

Step 2: TAKE RESPONSIBILITY

Taking responsibility involves owning up to your actions in addition to saying  “I’m sorry” or another phrase expressing your regret. Make sure you are clear and direct communicating the specific actions you are apologizing for.

Step 3: LISTEN AND IMPROVE

Listening and improving means actively listening. Give the person the opportunity to respond to you without interruption.  Focus on their communication and help them to feel heard by you. Show that you want to learn more by asking open-ended questions. Reflect back to them what you heard in their response to your apology. Keep an open mind as you listen and pay attention to their body language, tone, and other clues in addition to their words.

Be prepared to discuss changes you intend to make to avoid repeating the mistake.

A complete apology is not always easy to convey. Patience can also be difficult. Forgiveness of your actions may take time or may not be given at all. Regardless, it is an important step in your own healing and learning journey.