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Overcome The Oppression of Perfectionism

Emily awoke on Sunday morning with one thought, “I am exhausted!”  She wanted to stay in bed but thoughts were running through her mind, the refrigerator was empty, the house was a mess, she had to review a presentation she was delivering on Monday, she needed to pick up her five year old daughter from a sleepover and take her to get fitted for her dance costume and on and on and on.


At 42, Emily had spent the last 25 years striving to be the very best and to do the very best. Her ambition was not the problem. The problem was that no matter what Emily did, no matter how she showed up, no matter the effort she made, she was not satisfied.


Emily is an accomplished professional who is the head of HR for a large non-profit. Despite her success and the appreciation her company has for her, Emily is still waiting to “make it.” Her work product is a constant worry.  Emily never feels satisfied with her quarterly reports or her workplace presentations. She...

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Sometimes I Feel Too Much, Other times I Feel Numb

 

If your experience with feeling your emotions is all or nothing, know that you are not alone.


Reestablishing a strong connection with your emotional self is an essential component of experiencing connection to your whole self.


In a prior article on self-connection, I shared a holistic approach to self-connection encouraging you to assess the connection you have with all parts of your self, your physical self, emotional self, mental self, relational self, and intuitive self.

 

In Therapeutic Coaching we examine and assess our awareness, attention to, and connection with each of the 5 key elements of Self: Physical Self, Mental Self, Emotional Self, Relational Self, and Intuitive Self.

 


 

 

The Physical, Emotional, Mental, Intuitive, and Relational Selves.

 Well-Being Arises With The Experience of Balance Amongst The Parts of Our Selves

Well being arises when we experience balance amongst the Physical, Emotional, Mental, Intuitive, and Relational parts...

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The Heartache of Over Identification or Disconnection From Our Bodies

Reestablishing a strong connection with your physical body is an essential component of experiencing connection to your whole self.


In a prior article on self-connection, I take a holistic approach to self-connection encouraging you to assess the connection you have with all parts of your self, your physical self, emotional self, mental self, relational self, and intuitive self.

 

The Physical, Emotional, Mental, Intuitive, and Relational Selves.

Well being arises when we experience balance amongst the parts of ourselves. This balance in awareness and attention contributes to an optimal connection with the self.

Sadly, in our fast paced overly demanding society most of us do not experience balance in self-connection. We have some parts of the self that we over-identify with and other parts of the self that we are disconnected from. Well-being or the lack of well-being in one area of the self will lead to imbalances in the other areas of self, even to those parts of the self...

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Your Unique Energy Signature or Vibration

“Healing” refers to the awakening of natural self-organizing processes embedded in our DNA.
One facet of healing relates to our energy body, our unique vibration, and resonance and dissonance.

Your Energy Signature

Our energy bodies vibrate at a frequency that is reflective of our own unique being. This frequency is called our energy signature or our unique vibration. Within that signature or vibration, we vibrate higher or lower in frequency based upon our inner and outer environment.

When you consider unconditional love being at a very high frequency and fear at a very low frequency, you can see how your mental and emotional selves impact your overall vibration.

 

 

How We Read Energy


We read the energy of others all of the time. You may not notice that you are reading energy because the qualities of energy are generally subtle and our reading is typically undertaken at a subconscious level.

You are bringing awareness to the quality of another’s energy...

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Transpersonal Psychology is a Vehicle for Transformation

Psychology

Psychology is the scientific study of behavior and experience.

 

Transpersonal

Transpersonal involves valuing deep connectedness, relationship, and the way we subjectively experience our world and our shared humanity.

 

Transpersonal Experiences

Transpersonal experiences allow individuals to feel a sense of identity that goes beyond their
personal selves to encompass the broader aspects of humanity and even the universe

 

Transpersonal Connection

Transpersonal connection includes fostering understanding of dimensions all humans share with a deeper self, others, nature, and the universe.

 

Transpersonal psychology

Transpersonal psychology includes everything that mainstream psychology does
but it also includes a focus on behaviors and experiences which seem to transcend an individual’s, or group’s, sense of identity, with special attention to how those behaviors and experiences can be transformative.

 

What is Transformation?

The...

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What It Means and Why It Is Essential To Be Self-Connected

 

It has long been known and accepted that close relationships with others is an important component of well-being.  In contrast, “knowing oneself” and the relationship we have with ourselves has only recently been the subject of research and general knowledge.


Regarding our awareness of self-connection, nowadays, self-connection is touted on social media.  We are bombarded with images of a person holding steadily to a broad grin. But what does it really mean to be self-connected, how  does one become self-connected, and how does gaining self-connection influence feelings of well-being?  

People differ in the extent to which they tend to experience self-connection.


Self-connection is defined in the psychological research and in research on connection theory in particular as consisting of three parts:

  • an awareness of oneself,
  • an acceptance of oneself based on this awareness,
  • and an alignment of one’s behavior with this awareness.

 

...

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9 Simple Steps: Safe Space Meditation

Dr. Jodi Peary
9 Simple Steps: Safe Space Meditation
9:38
 

We all need a place inside of ourselves where we can go to feel safe and at peace. This place is one we create within our imaginations. Having such a place is an immensely valuable resource. If you feel un-grounded, taking a few moments in your safe space can help you to deepen your roots and connection with the earth. If you are experiencing stress, going to your imagined safe space may give you the time and space you need to to sort through what you are experiencing. Sometimes when processing challenging emotions, we can feel overwhelmed. Having this resource within you can put the elements at play in perspective.

For an article about epigenetics and the science behind how techniques such as visualization, affirmations, and mindfulness practices can enable us to harness the power of our consciousness to influence our physical health. go here

The science of psychology has an epic amount of research establishing that imagination can be a great tool for us to use to eliminate fears,...

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Coping With the Loss of a Loved One

 Whether the loss of a loved one is expected or sudden, it remains one of the most difficult challenges to overcome in life. It's hard to cope with the inevitable flood of emotions.

In your heart you know that your loved one wouldn't want you to grieve forever. They want you to carry on and live a good life, while still remembering and loving them. The best honor and dedication to your relationship with a loved one who has passed, is to have learned from not only the loss but the incredible love as well in order to live the rest of your life in a happy and healthy manner.

Each person must grieve in their own unique way and in accordance with their time frame. However, it can be helpful to know ways in which others have been helped in their grieving in the past.

Consider the following tips for coping with loss:

 

  1. Be open. Your first reaction to loss may be to close up. You may need time alone to work through your feelings and to grieve. For some their first reaction to...
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Turn Inward and Discover What’s Most Central, a Core Belief Exercise

 

Are you interested in discovering more about your authentic self?

Here’s a Belief Journaling Exercise to turn inward and discover what’s most central.  This belief exercise is powerful because our beliefs often drive how we think, feel, and behave.

 

Our beliefs often mirror our thought patterns. Much of the scaffolding of our lives is built on what we think about ourselves, others, and the world.  When we seek to gain more clarity about our viewpoints, we develop more agency over our reactions and behaviors. Thus, we can make more thoughtful, purposeful choices.

 

WHAT ARE YOUR CORE BELIEFS?

 

Your beliefs may have origins in your culture, the location where you were born or live, religion, spirituality, your lived experience, or your deepest desires.

The Many Types of Core Beliefs

  • Self-related core beliefs such as, "I deserve to live a good life."  or  "I am resilient and can handle life's challenges."
  • Other related core...
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Managing Obstacles On The Journey Toward Your Most Authentic Self.

We all face obstacles to living in resonance with our highest self, spirit, or most authentic self.

Obstacles Along The Path

 

Common obstacles along the path toward living as your most authentic self include:

  • Self-Criticism,
  • Acting Out of Habit,
  • Fear of Being Labeled Selfish, and
  • A Need for External Validation.

 

First, we need to notice the obstacles.

 

Self-inquiry

The capacity to expose unexamined beliefs, thoughts, and stories that create unnecessary suffering. Self-inquiry reveals the eternal truth of who you are, free and at peace.

Some of the obstacles I have encountered along the way have had to do with my wanting. My ambition to do everything and do it the best I can and to compare that best to other people's best can be an enormous boulder.  For many years that boulder tipped the balance of my existence more toward human doing than human being.

 

Canadian physician and trauma expert Dr. Gabor Maté said on a recent podcast that the...

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