The Cumulative Effect of Narcissistic Abuse

Narcissistic abuse often equates with emotional abuse. It is difficult to find support when one is being emotionally abused by a spouse or ex-spouse, which makes the abuse even more devastating and isolating.

Why is it so hard to find support for narcissistic abuse? I have written before about the shame we may feel as victims of narcissistic abuse which makes it extremely difficult to ask for help. But there is another insidious reason that even when we have the courage to reach out for help, we may not be heard, even by the people who we are closest to.  

When we finally muster up the courage to share our experiences with a friend or family member, we relay the more recent incidents of cruelty and abuse that we have experienced.   We share with friends or family members the examples of the mistreatment not yet suppressed, and they may think none of the incidents were a big deal.

The friend or family member considers just the one or two accounts of emotional abuse they have heard about from us, and comes to believe that we are overreacting or that what we experienced is not a big deal.

This starts a vicious and lonely cycle. We then feel shame and keep the incidents of emotional abuse to ourselves. We may even question ourselves and wonder if we are overly sensitive.  When this happens, the set is staged for enduring emotional abuse over a long period of time. Filing for divorce does not quiet the narcissist, who finds the divorce arena to be a new stage upon which to act with a new audience to preen before.

The thing is emotional abuse is real and extremely damaging. It has a cumulative effect, even when the incidents are of daily small acts of mistreatment. Each instance on its own may not have been devastating but when everything the abuser has done is taken as a whole it amounts to abuse and is damaging. It does not stop being damaging just because we have filed for divorce. 

i created a private Facebook group for women called Divorce Recovery Community.  If you would like to support other women in being heard or you would like to receive the support of other women who are considering divorce, or are in the midst of divorce or who have been divorced for a period, do stop by and see if you might like to join us. 

You are not meant to endure and are certainly not deserving of the cruel treatment that narcissistic partners dish out. Here is where you can find  Divorce Recovery Community

If you are ready to manifest a life of peace and contentment, download my free Manifestation Journal

If you are interested in divorce coaching, visit me here: Divorce Coaching With Dr. Peary

 Most Importantly Know

YOU ARE NOT ALONE!