Heal The Wound of Believing You Do Not Matter

Tracing unhealthy relationship patterns to their source.

Natalie, both palms raised toward the ceiling, pleaded for an answer to her question,

"Why do I always to get into relationships with people who don't care about the relationship as much as I do?"

Johnathon shared,

"I am the giver in every relationship."

Johnathon's feelings of hopelessness shone in his grey blue eyes.

 Both Natalie and Johnathon grew up with parents who did not make them a priority.

Natalie

As a child, Natalie's father regularly returned home from work after she was already in bed. Natalie's mother suffered from depression and rarely left her bedroom to greet Natalie when she arrived home from school.  The week-ends didn't change the family dynamic. Natalie's mother remained in bed and her father pursued his passion for collectible cars. He attended auctions and searched neighborhood garages for hard to find parts.

Johnathon

Johnathon was the oldest ...

Hypnotherapy: A Painless Path to Fearless Living

Hypnotherapy is a powerful and painless path for creating a life you are in love with living.

The Struggle to Creating Meaningful Change in Our Lives is Real

We need not struggle. We need to intentionally let go of what doesn't serve us and replace it with what does. That in turn enables us to give to the world.  In the deep state of relaxation that is hypnosis we program our own minds to do just that.

The cultural phenomenon of doing everything and nothing with our days.

We start with the best intentions for meaningful change.

We promise to cast aside old habits, deepen our purpose and integrate that purpose into our daily living.

We commit to having a greater impact. 

We deeply yearn for more out of this one beautiful life.

Yet, time and time again distractions and old habits stand in the way.

Over and over, our focus seems to dissolve into the air around us.

If you can relate to this pattern, know this, You are not...

Getting The Love & Connection You Crave 

Love and connection are universal psychological needs.

The ability to express emotions surrounding these needs is one of the most important ingredients in healthy intimate relationships.

We must remind each other in the midst of our incredibly busy lives, as well as remind ourselves, that we need the visceral experience of really feeling love and connection. We want to feel it fill us.

Since the needs for love and connection are universal, it can be difficult to understand why asking for love and connection may be met with signs of bewilderment by your partner. Does your partner stop and ask you, even more, do you stop and ask yourself what you need, specifically, to actually feel loved and connected. The request for love and connection is a broad request for two complex and overarching needs.

Trina: 'Why do you go out to dinner with your brother and his girlfriend whenever I am out of town but never want to get together with them w

...

Do Childhood Experiences Impact Adult Relationships?

Do adults who experienced abuse, neglect, or trauma as children experience challenges in relationships related to their histories? 

It is not uncommon in therapy to encounter individuals with childhood traumas that  continue to impact their important relationships.

Trauma in itself does not inevitably lead to anxious attachment or anxiety in relationships. It is possible for children to experience trauma and other hardships, but because their caregivers are adequately protective in response to the dangers, they develop secure or relatively secure attachment behaviors.

But what about situations where parents or caregivers are not adequately loving, protective, and nurturing?

Do adults who experienced abuse, neglect, or trauma as children and who developed protective behaviors as children to remain safe, experience challenges in adult relationships related to their histories? 

Research shows that adults with negative childhood ex...

 4 Questions to Ask Yourself to Overcome Anxiety 

Overcome The Oppression of Perfectionism

Emily awoke on Sunday morning with one thought, “I am exhausted!”  She wanted to stay in bed but thoughts were running through her mind, the refrigerator was empty, the house was a mess, she had to review a presentation she was delivering on Monday, she needed to pick up her five year old daughter from a sleepover and take her to get fitted for her dance costume and on and on and on.

At 42, Emily had spent the last 25 years striving to be the very best and to do the very best. Her ambition was not the problem. The problem was that no matter what Emily did, no matter how she showed up, no matter the effort she made, she was not satisfied.

Emily is an accomplished professional who is the head of HR for a large non-profit. Despite her success and the appreciation her company has for her, Emily is still waiting to “make it.” Her work product is a constant worry.  Emily never feels satisfied with her quarterly reports or her workplace presentation...

If your experience with feeling your emotions is all or nothing, know that you are not alone.

Reestablishing a strong connection with your emotional self is an essential component of experiencing connection to your whole self.


In a prior article on self-connection, I shared a holistic approach to self-connection encouraging you to assess the connection you have with all parts of your self, your physical self, emotional self, mental self, relational self, and intuitive self.

In Therapeutic Coaching we examine and assess our awareness, attention to, and connection with each of the 5 key elements of Self:
 Physical Self
, Mental Self, 
Emotional Self
, Relational Self
, and Intuitive Self.

The Physical, Emotional, Mental, Intuitive, and Relational Selves.

 Well-Being Arises With The Experience of Balance Amongst The Parts of Our Selves

Well being arises when we experience balance amongst the Physical, Emotional, Mental, Intuitive, and Relational parts of ourselves. B...

The Heartache of Over Identification or Disconnection From Our Bodies

Reestablishing a strong connection with your physical body is an essential component of experiencing connection to your whole self.

In a prior article on self-connection, I take a holistic approach to self-connection encouraging you to assess the connection you have with all parts of your self, your physical self, emotional self, mental self, relational self, and intuitive self.

The Physical, Emotional, Mental, Intuitive, and Relational Selves.

Well being arises when we experience balance amongst the parts of ourselves. This balance in awareness and attention contributes to an optimal connection with the self.

Sadly, in our fast paced overly demanding society most of us do not experience balance in self-connection. We have some parts of the self that we over-identify with and other parts of the self that we are disconnected from. Well-being or the lack of well-being in one area of the self will lead to imbala...

Your Unique Vibration

“Healing” refers to the awakening of natural self-organizing processes embedded in our DNA.
One facet of healing relates to our energy body, our unique vibration, and resonance and dissonance.

Your Energy Signature

Our energy bodies vibrate at a frequency that is reflective of our own unique being. This frequency is called our energy signature or our unique vibration. Within that signature or vibration, we vibrate higher or lower in frequency based upon our inner and outer environment.

When you consider unconditional love being at a very high frequency and fear at a very low frequency, you can see how your mental and emotional selves impact your overall vibration.

How We Read Energy

We read the energy of others all of the time. You may not notice that you are reading energy because the qualities of energy are generally subtle and our reading is typically undertaken at a subconscious level.

You are bringing awareness to the quality of another’s energy ...

Transpersonal Psychology is a Vehicle for Transformation

Psychology

Psychology is the scientific study of behavior and experience.

Transpersonal

Transpersonal involves valuing deep connectedness, relationship, and the way we subjectively experience our world and our shared humanity.

Transpersonal Experiences

Transpersonal experiences allow individuals to feel a sense of identity that goes beyond their
personal selves to encompass the broader aspects of humanity and even the universe

Transpersonal Connection

Transpersonal connection includes fostering understanding of dimensions all humans share with a deeper self, others, nature, and the universe.

Transpersonal psychology

Transpersonal psychology includes everything that mainstream psychology does
but it also includes a focus on behaviors and experiences which seem to transcend an individual’s, or group’s, sense of identity, with special attention to how those behaviors and experiences can be transformative.